By Mohit
I've never been beautiful.
I've never been ugly.
My face is just precisely too average to be looked at but not to be loved.
My eyes are just too dry to be drowned in them.
My smile is too invisible to be laughed with.
My hands are soft enough as shattered glass
My name is too silent to be touched by her lips.
And so my heart is still not broken as it is untouched as the sun itself.
I'm too alive to live alone
I'm too right to do the wrong
And still, I'm asking to be punished
There's a cage far away
Ropes are hanging in thin air
And there's a knife parallel to the ground and the sky but it doesn't point at me.
I'm at the other end
I'm the murderer who likes to bargain
How much pain do I want?
How much is there to feel?
Yes, I want it all
I know it's written on my forehead
All I'm waiting for is a final death
Let it come to me but slowly
I'm not in a hurry
I'd like to see it coming
I'd like to talk to it first
I'll let it break my mind
I'll let it keep me awake at nights
I'll borrow some fear from all the ones dying
And maybe then I'll cry.
To all the people of this earth and all the birds in the sky,
Thank you for loving me too much
Thank you for leaving me too early
Thank you for showing me
There's a sun inside my chest
And I'm still too ugly.